Peter Jackson makes muppets bang – Video Clerk with Wade from Gallows / Alexisonfire
Peter Jackson makes muppets bang – Video Clerk with Wade from Gallows / Alexisonfire


Down at Suspect Video, gettin’ weird. Meet the Feebles. Like the Muppet show on meth! Narrator: Sex! “I’m hot, Bletch. But not the way you think.” Narrator: Drugs! Narrator: Animal husbandry. “Why did you bring us here? It’s not mine!” Narrator: Corruption! “Barry, do me a line.” Narrator: From the killing fields of Vietnam to the playing fields of Beverly Hills. “Oh, what the-”
“Take that ya bastard!” “Bastard!” “It’s the big one, Harry.” “It’s the big one, Harry.” “No, it can’t be! I’ve taken precaution.” Narrator: From Peter Jackson, the director
who gave you Bad Taste, comes a movie with no taste at all. Meet the Feebles, a motion picture that gives all it’s got. Meet the Feebles the adult puppet movie with something to offend
everyone. There’s only one way to really improve a perfect script. And that’s scabby muppet characters instead
of actors. There’s some things you just unsee – like muppets doing lines of blow, and banging
one another. “Not another panty-sniffer! He’s going to
want me to piss in his mouth.” The best part about this movie is the puppets
projectile vomiting. I, for one, think muppets vomiting is something
that’s absolutely hilarious and this movie is chock-full of it. On the Roger Corman B-Movie Scale, I’d have
to give this a three for boobs, because they are puppet
boobs. A, maybe a two for blood, because I don’t
remember if there is any. And bizarre: ten out of five. I’d pair Meet the Feebles with drinking Jagermeister
for the first time in the woods naturally (bush party) and, uh, moseying downtown and, uh, jumping
on your friend’s ska show, crashing their set
with your own band, being a little bit out of it, especially because you rolled one more pinner, and then falling over, spraining your knee really bad, taking a cab home and you’re trying to jump
up your stairs without waking your parents up because even though you’ve chewed a lot of
pieces of gum, they know you smell like booze, but the problem is you wear two really long
wallet chains ‘cuz you’re 16 and you are soooo punk. Your whole family wakes up, your mother comes into your room, you’re all messed up, things are going side to side, she says, “You need a new circle of friends.
I’m disappointed in you.” Your dad doesn’t even say anything – he doesn’t
really care. And that’s how you watch Meet the Feebles. Oh my mom was so mad. [laughter] Probably two studded belts too. [laughter: “Two belts”] So I’m going to give this movie a meagre score
and that is five bags of Native smokes out of ten. Tell me what you think about Meet the Feebles
in the comments section. More next week on Video Clerk. (sound effect noises) Like, glass breaking. Effect! Ksssshhh!

6 thoughts on “Peter Jackson makes muppets bang – Video Clerk with Wade from Gallows / Alexisonfire”

  1. robotlogik says:

    great vid, great movie, dead-alive soon i hope, and maybe some early cronenberg?

  2. Nathan Navidzadeh says:

    UN-FREAKIN-REAL HAHAHA

  3. jake hohendorn says:

    5 bags of native smokes. HA

  4. NECHO II says:

    NOW ALL WE NEED ID BRAINDEAD/DEAD ALIVE FROM 1992!

  5. Dimitrios Apostolos says:

    wait suspect video in toronto??!!! im always there!!

  6. Renato Cunha says:

    Are you taking suggestions? How about Basket Case? Classic movie.

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