Hello, everybody! My name is Markiplier, and welcome to 5 Weird Games. We’re gonna be starting with a game called “Antbassador” Where you are… an Antbassador… Watch- It- Uh- Just.. Here. Okay, let’s go for this one. Uh, this is a game- Ah, nevermind, I’ll let it explain itself. The Antbassador.. He uhh- He seeks to earn our favor, and cement the uneasy peace between us! Our fate lies in his hand. If he plays it well, he could bring our worlds together. Oh. *wheeze laughing* So- *giggles* This is.. This is Ant- How do I- Oh… Oh.. Oh.. oh-HO-HO-HO NO “GASP! “A tall stranger!” “It is The Antbassador!” Oh, I don’t like the way that fingie- Oh, boy! Hoppity, hippity, hoppoty- Excuse me! Antbassador here on official Antbassity business. “Hail, Antbassador! I would give thee a feast, but mine crate is stuck!” Well, fear not! My fingie shall poke the truth out! Hu-.. *grunt* Hang on, fingie a little problematic. Aw, shoo- There! “Blessed be the Queen!” I’ll just take my pittance of an apple for you to f- alright… On my way! Dootilydoo! Work, work, work, work, work, work. “Hail, Antbassador! Partake in the gate swi-” OoPs. “-switching ceremony and open the doors to Antopia!” Are you the Pope? Nice Pope hat. Alright, sure. I’m gonna switchy swatch dis- Oh, my God. Hang on, how do I curl my tootsie? Or my fingie? I’m gonna tur- curl- this way- with- *gasp of realization* With my clicky! My clicky! OK I’m gonna clicky, okay- curl. Okay, hang on. CuRL! No, don’t move forward when you curl. Move- Pu- AuGh! You’re a tricky one! Like opening a SODIE POPPIE! I’m gonna getcha! I’m gonna goochi goochi goo all over your f- AUGHHHH! Goochie, goochi! Come on, gimme a goochi- Give me a toochi- goochi goochi goo “I lied… There is no ceremony. I am a layabout. Blessed be the Queen!” Alright. Pff- Sorry! *giggles* “A fine entrance! Though you shan’t be able to make a second!” Um- Sorry? “Where is my hat!? What is my job!? I cannot know without it!” Awh! What is my job? What is my purpose without hat? I’ve- oh. “Forsooth! I am self-employed!” *laughing* “Blessed be the Queen!” Okay, let me review the controls real quick so you guys know what kind of hell I’m in I lift up the mouse, it goes up, and then it flops back down. So, I have to have this constant, like, upward motion if I want to stay uppy. “Woe betide the sun! My fiery arch-” What did you say? “My firey arch nemesis… May we war upon thee” Oh, geez. Geez, that’s a little… That’s a little much, huh? “My word! These soldiers have begun a terrible row!–” *punch noise*
I’M SORRY!!!! I AM SORRY. I DIDN’T MEAN TO DO THAT. Okay, just the hat- *slap noise* OH MY GOD, I’M SORRY!! I’M NOT- That is not on purpose, I’m just trying to, like, scoop your hat off of you. *big slap noise* I’M NOT-!! I’m not trying to kill you! “These soldiers have begun a terrible row! Someone knock their hats off!” Okay… Very daintily… Oh, goochi- Oh, goo- goochi, goochi goo- Goochi scwoochi! OH, goochi doochi! AH! *gunshot* NOOOOOOOO!! THESE HANDS, THEY CAN ONLY KILL!! Goochi, doochi, goochi… Okay, goochi… Okay Goochi, goochi, goochi, okay. Goochi, goochi, gOOCHI Goochi… Goochi… Just a nice little… HABAP! HABAP! HNEBA! ABA! ABA! *punch noise*
AH! AHHHHHHHHHH!! Why did I kill THAT one? OH, GOD! I’M SORRY! I’m an Antbassador, I’m an Antmurderer… Aaagoochi! Goochi, doochi- *splat* AH! Sorry, sorry… I’m so sorry! I’m so sorry, I’m SO sorry! Goochi, toochi, toochi- *gunshot* AHHH! God, I’m a murdering mess- Okay. Please, please, please, okay, please. Please. Please just- Hhhhhh- *whispers* Okay. Good thing I explained how the controls are bullshit- Oooooo, OH! Okay. HOW’S YOUR HAT STILL ON? NO! NO! NO! I WILL NOT KILL! I WILL NOT KILL AGAIN! Okay… “Please at last! Blessed be something or other…” *wheeze* *wheeze* Okay.. “Hail, Antbassador! Queen Antoinette awaits!” *tries to French* EXCUSEZ-MOI! EXCUCHIMUCHI- “Curse thy kin, Antbassador. Your kingdom cannot be trusted. I would cast thee out if it were my right.” Okay, fair enough. Alright. “Well met, Antbassador. Word of your good deeds has reached my antennae.” “This era of peace was hard fought. We must seal our newfound allegiance by common blood.” “I’m ready, Mother.” Marry princess Antastas”- ANT-TAS-TASIA. ANTastasia “Crown her as your Queen.” …I don’t want to have to- I’m trying to think of the word. It’s not commemorate, it’s not commiserate… CONSUMMATE. That’s the one. I DON’T WANNA FUCK AN ANT. Basically. Is what I’m tryin’ to say here. I uhh- How do I..? How do I schoochi dooch- Okay, that’s not- UWHOAOH! Sorry. I’m trying not to sqwoosh you. I swear, I’m- Okay… How am I going to goochi schoochi this? Okay, hang on. I just gotta… Just gotta pokie wokie it. Just gotta- WUUUAH- Okay, we got some progress made! Pokie wokie- This is not a preview of events to come when we- OOWOOWOOWOOWOO… Hey. Woah. Hang on. Okay, how do I- Oh! Oh, if I right click, I keep it pokie wokie- No, I don’t, that’s a lie. That was a lie. AAAAAAHH!! Oh, this is gonna be hell. I can already- *crunch* NOOOOO!!! I’M SORRY… I’M SORRYYY. Okay, let me listen- listen to what you have to say… “Well met.” Oh. What a- What a beautiful princess you have. Oh, I can’t move it yet. Alright, I’ll just rest my fingie here. I’m ready, Mother! Okay, sure you are. With thee- This crown… I do thee wed! With this crown… With this crown- Okay. Okay, we’re almost there. *GAASSSP* “I oppose this union!” Hey, wait. “Antonio! You knave!” “Antastasia belongs among her own kin!” “I still remember the scars of war! The destruction this ‘Antbassador’ has wrought upon our people.” “It has haunted me for years!” “Antonio, you were born last week.” “A DUEL IS IT!? HAVE AT THEE!” Uh… Um… Here let me- let me just- Let me just swoop some knowledge in from down from on high. Listen. This is gonna be a crash zoom Listen, buddy. You- -have never fucked with anyone as hurricanishly destructive as me. You and your kind would be a sssssssssTAIN ON MY- *gunshot* Oh. “Our peace has indeed been sealed by blood. I pray it is the last drop.” “Now let us greet Antopia as the new royal family.” Uh… Okay. Oh. And we’re doNE– *WHEEZE* *laughing* And then we’re done! *Giggles* AH! AHH! AUHHH! AOOOH! Okay, so, that was Antbassador. OOH! That was fun though, that was fun. I do love, like, these physically enabled weird games. Like, those are the best kind of games ‘cuz you just have no idea what you’re going to be doin’! And poor Antonio. Hilariously named, but poor Antonio. Just misguided. Just misguided. Oh, well. What can you do? Oh, it’s a- Oh it’s a two player game… Alright, well I’ll play with myself. WASD and Space… IJKL plus Enter… I can play two player I can probably do this! Ok… Alri- Oh no… Oh no… Oh no… I am so lonely I need… I don- What am I-
Wait- What am I- Wait what’s the objective her- OH… oh…….. There! Ohhhh… …hhhhhhh!!! Wait… I need…. THIS ONE! HAH! I’M BEATING MYSELF! HEY GUYS! LOOK! I’M BEATING MYSELF! Hey
I’m so good at this Ohhhh ME got it Too late, Buddy! Oh, you think you’re good? Er it’s like, which one of my eyes is gonna see the right WOOAW WOAH WAIT-WAIT, that was it! No no, oh that was NOT it. Ok. THIS WAS IT! THAT was it. Wait… That was it? This, dis, dat one Dat one-NO. That was it! That w- Neither of my hands are working! That was… Oh. That, No THAT WAS It. No THAAT was it. Ah ffffffrick me. THIIS. There we go. I got it. Alright, ok, alright. Mr Second Hand got it. Ooooohhhhhhhhhh Good ol’ righty. *kisses fingers* Righty… *kisses fingers again* I love you righty… You know I love you. *kisses palm of hand* *kisses fingers again* mmmhh *passionately kisses palm* You’re so special to me. You need to step it up a lot Cause I-ah-I like I-I need you to understand that this is important for me. SO DON’T FUCK IT UP! *demonic music* DON’T FUCK IT UP! Sorry, I love you… *kisses palm* Ok let’s try that again. That was good. Alright… Now that I-I got my… coordination goin on, wait… Wait! Yes! YES! YEAH! Ok, Lefty, good job lefty! Oh you got that good. Oh… no, that’s a trick! That’s a trick. That ain’t it, no! Righty knows better than that. But lefty’s lookin’ … Lefty’s looking real close. Lefty, Lefty’s-OOAWOA-Righty… RIGHTY! Woah Righty is really showing up a storm. Righty. Righty? Left-Oh no! Oah-OOAH! LEFTY’S SWOOPING IN! Aahhh Righty you got one chance and you’ve failed. You suck ass But lefty’s lookin more and more special each day. Ok… A-alright Oh-OAHH HEEY!! Oh my god. I always knew that you could do it. You know I always believed in you. You know I always- *kisses hand* -believed in you lefty. I always knew that you were the most special. The most incredibly well-shaped, formly, and beautiful… Righty… *demonic music returns* YOU FUCKED IT UP! WHAT DID I TELL LEFTY? YOU WERE THERE! DON’T ACT LIKE YOU WEREN’T THERE, YOU WERE THERE! And you disappointed me… *sad music begins* I believed in you… I believed in you… Now kiss- Oh, wait. Wait. NO. Wait, GUY’S WAIT. NO! I- I can change! I can be better! I can be better than this! NOOOOOOOOOOOO!! *kiss sound* That’s an awkward time to cut the music off… Ok, alright, well erm… Okay…alright- I’m gonna… *cough* Erm… Can you just delete that? Like, ALL of that? Everything? Ah-that… I- Can you delete that? *mumbling* No one saw that right? Ok, alright… There we go. Alright, welcome to ‘Godly Corp’ demo. I don’t know what- Game Narrator: “Nations top scientists on the zombie virus that appeared just two weeks ago.” “They released information saying the symptoms to watch for are aggression, foaming from the mouth, deterioration in motor skills and an unbelievable hunger.” “Be advised that if an infected becomes hostile, the only way to harm them is to shoot them in the head.” *static sound* Good..to know. Ok, so I-er argh god. UhhUHHUHH H “Welcome to our company employee NR 5835468. Please listen to this introduction before starting” “First look at the clock in front of you, it shows how much time is left before the end of your shift” Yeah? “On the right you can see the board that will display instructions for your task. And in the center is a button that you can press when you are ready to start your shift” “Now please ready the instructions and when ready move cover from the button and press it to start, Good Luck!” Oookay, alright *reading* Make sure all crucial points on this planet get enough heat. Also you might run into some bugs. Just don’t let them affect the planet. Some kinda Cthulu thing goin’ on here and I’m not…
“Press the start button in the middle of the wall when ready.” …one hundred percent sure I’m into it but uh… Yeah let’s, uh, let’s Oough Let’s flip this up and let’s get to oh– “Tick Tock goes the clock” I’m trying to– Listen, I’m- I’m r- I’m trying to Oh!! Uehh, did I hit it?? Oh! Ookay, let’s go to… South America– Euuhhh, wait no wait what is it South America! Oh, wait no, wait what? South– eh what? Ohh wait a min– oh ah OHHH Ohh, legitimately this is like a– OH it’s a heat lamp and I have to This is the game Hey, whoa whoa hey get– EUUHH get out of here! Get out of here Alright, so Antarctica needs some heat I guess which is kinda weird… This is the game This is the game? Get outta here! Where’d my– Aaaaah Where am I? Okay this– I don’t think Antarctica needs that much heat but Aaaalright ? “Hey intern. Can you change this radio station? Just hit it with your… limb” Whoa! *Piano melody starts* Oh boy… *hits bug* Hyah! Hyah! Uh oh, is this not Asia? Wait, where’s Asia? Ohh, there’s Asia, I’m sorry. “Warning! Heat level dangerously low” Ah shit, ah! It’s hard to control! Ah, shit, it’s AH My brain! MY BRAIN!! Okay, South America– Get, GET OUTTA H– Where is my– AAAAAH, WHERE AM I? “Warning! Heat level dangerously low” Okay, Jesus Oh my God, oh my god oh my god I can’t, I can’t do this *to the bugs* GET OUT, get out Okay, so I gotta think of it– it’s from the perspective of… …the heat lamp, that’s what the perspective is… Ah-WHAAat is that supposed to be?? AH!! WHY? Who did that?! What is someone pulling a prank on me?? Good GOD this tentacle doesn’t work! Euh, just no, no, no, no, NO I SAID NO This doesn’t make any sense I don’t get it, and I don’t understand My tentacle is STUCK Okay, thank you, oh Radio: …..Chris Fox has the story…. *Cheering* Yay! I did it!1!! I t–fuck I did it?? *disbelief* I did it?!?1 WHOA! *tentative* Wahoo? *Stamp noise I’m average. All that work, all that stress everything that I was doing and I’m average It’s gettin’ kind of dumb but I know I can– I get it oH what is that “Your last assignments were rather stressful. Today you will get an easy and relaxing task. I hope you like gardening” I don’t really, I really don’t Oh oh no, wait wait I just– I need this I– How am I– Wha- how the– I’m tooching it with the– I’M– *Heavy mouse clicks* I’m really tooching this thing AWH *Sigh* Thank you, please give me another thank you very much thank y- GOD DON’– FUCKING AWWWWWW CAN I HAVE ANOTHER CAN YOU BRING ANOTHER ONE IN THANK YOU, THAT’S WHAT I WOULD APPRECIATE JUST DROP IT INTO MY TENTACLE THAT’D BE GREAT Okay, GRAB, tooch I– Mmmhh… I’m left clicking, I’m literally…
*Heavy mouse clicks* I can’t ONE MORE PLEASE ONE MORE POR FAVOR PLEASE GIVE ME ONE MORE Ohh God… Look, I’m touch, I left click, I click and hold, It doesn’t do either, It doesn’t work This doesn’t work. It obviously doesn’t work Maybe I can’t grab it until I start it- -Maybe I can’t grab it until I start it “Tick tock goes the clock” Tick tock goes the clock indeed Okay, can I grab it now? Can I grab it? Can I grab it now? Can I grab it? Can I grab it?? Can I grab it now? Could I grab it now? How about now grab? How about now grab?? How about NOW grab? How about– How about– OH my GOD I WANNA GRAB IT SO BADLY!! JUST– LET ME How’s that happen? How’d you get your tentacle stuck wrapped around the Start button?
“Warning! almost all trees are dead.” YEAH, FUNNY ABOUT THAT, IT’D BE AMAZING IF YOU GAVE ME THUMBS!! Okay, grab! And… no grab.
*Siren starts* Alright. No grab. Uh red alert. “Warning! Security breach alert. All employees on floors 50 to 70 please follow the emergency protocol 66!” “Ummm… First shut down this alarm…” “…Alright don’t panic, just pick up the emergency device…” “… and from there you should know what to do” Dude, I can NOT pick– Oh… I CAN’T PICK ANYTHING UP I CAN’T– OHH I CAN’T AWH, YOU KNOW I WOULD IF I COULD, I’M– **sniff** I would if I could! I would– ALSO the mouse goes OUTSIDE THE GAME, which EVERYONE knows is my FAVORITE– Ookay I don’t know what’s happening… I can’t… click… on… I CAN’T… GRAB IT BUT I CAN’T… GRAB IT IF I CAN’T gRAB IT HOW AM I SUPPOSED– If I could GRAB this OH BOY, that looks fun If I could JUUUUUST…. If I could just GRAAAAB the– **exhales** **EXHALES** **whispers** I’m so angry… *bass anger noise* It’s right mouse, it’s RIGHT MOUSE BUTTO– Oh my God it’s right mouse button It’s ri– it’s not left it’s right Oh my God OH MY GOD oH, OH it’s, OH WOW it’s RIGHT!!! OH!! HUH!!! THAT’s FUNNY AH!
*bass anger noise* That’s the– it’s the ah– oHhH It’s, it’s not left it’s RIGHT It’s right mouse button The instructions were… were very wrong The instructions, oh I wish they were… were– Oh, it’s not working? What the hell? The hell am I-? Wh- What? What am I–? What am I–? What am I–? Wait, what am, What… it’s, but it’s not working but. it’s. not. But it’s not– But it’s NOT BUT IT’S NOT YOU SEE HOW IT’S NOT um, uh, WORKING?? iT’S UH uhh justuuhh, I… uhm Okay… I think I can do it. You gotta spray em while they’re alive or else they’re just gonna die which should… have been obvious I guess but… Uh, some were gonna die no matter what I did– Oh, that’s, different… Oh! Ah that’s interesting! I didn’t expect that to go that way but okay! Alright this is fine… I’m not spraying behind it! I’m not, that’s a lie. thehh… don’t lie You wouldn’t lie to me… Oh! I was… …spraying… …behind… **Mark realizes he is an idiot sandwich** *gunshot* *gunshot#2* *gunshot#3*
Computer: NANI?!?!? Mark: *mockingly* NANI?!? Hahaha XD Computer: NANI?!? Computer: NANI?!?!? Computer: NANI?!?!?!?!? Mark: *mockingly* NANI?!? XD Okay alright NOW I’m, NOW I’m into this game *high pitched and garbled* NANI?! That’s– okay, now this game has gotten… way more fun, this This game… pretty good Daz pretty gud… Okay, alright, you know what? I- I had my resevations about this game but this is clearly one of the best games ever made now. I see it I see it, I see it now I can see the quality built into every- every single pore of this game. I got it The tentale weirded me out at first, but now now I’m into it Now I know exactly what I’m doing. And I can keep these bad boys alive until the end of time If only the instructions were perfect… Is this what the security breach is? Is this really what the security breach is all about? Okay, now it’s funny Now that I’m less angry and now that I’m spraying in the right place this is good stuff This is good stuff Aw, hell yeah! There we go There we go I love this game This game is good! This is a good game! This is a good game Gooooood good game I better get above average! YAAAAHOO Ya- WaHOOOO WHEEE! An excellent! Alright good, good Okay, ah, do I even want to keep going with this? Really? No! ‘Kay, ‘Build a planet from the available pieces, green hologram shows next piece needed. Once in place, central scan will show you what tool to use to place this thing in. Repeat until the planet’s complete. Also: protect the seond planet from incoming meee…’ Okay Okay, thank you Alright I have a piece Oh Uh, whe- where Whe- where are we Wait- wh- wait Haven’t I-? What? oh okay Caught one! I think What do I need to get it in place? Y- get out of the way, please! Glue? Okay, glue! Glue Glue, glue No, no glue glue glue glue glue glue Got it! Okay Alright, you? Are you the one? Is this the one? No? Okay, this one! No, not that This one Oh, this is like Surgery Simulator in space Is it this one? No? It- it’s gotta be the- YEAHH *beep* Oh yeah, gimme that! Uh, where’s the hammer? Give me the ham-ho! Come here, ham-ho! BINK BONK BINK BONK BINK BONK SCHLINK SPLONK spink bon- Why is it spinning in my hand? That doesn’t make any goddamn sense! No! Shoot! Wait! Shoot! Shoot! Shoot! Shoot! Oh! Okay, hammer! Gimme the hammer Get outta the way Got this hammer. I got the hammer. Get it! bim bom bim BABABABABABA Okay, gotta shoot Gotta shoot! shoot shoot shoot shoot shoot shoot shoot shoot shoot shoot shoot shoot shoot shoot shoot Gimme the hammer I hit it ONCE? I hit it once, really? That was one hit? Gimme the hammer, gimme the hammer BAP BAP BAAA BA BA baba Okay glu- NOW glue? Why do I got… Okay Alright What was next, you? Hmm, ah, maybe? Yeah? No? Goddammit Okay, this one? Yeah! That was it! Okay, hammer Oh shit shoot shoot shoot blam blam blam blam blam blam blam I don’t understand how this is working or what kind of office is able to shoot into space and also have… um a laser system. I am running out of time give to meee got it got it got it, okay gimme another one Come on gimme, gimme There we go Hammer radio: “WE WANNA WORK! WE WANNA WORK!” Mark: Shut up! I don’t c- Not the… point right now! oh come on There we go There we go! Come on! hammer hammer hammer Shoot shoot shoot! Shoot! Shoot Shoot shoot shoot! Shoot! Shoot! ShhhooOOOT! Shooot! Shooot! SHOOot! shoot, shoot Okay gimme gimme gimme get get get get hammer hammer hammer hammer Come on! Hammer it! How is this not hammering? Okay, there we go ahhhhhh That’s good okay AAAAAAAHHHHHH!!! Okay, we’re good Got the last one And blap! Okay Hammer it! Gimme that! I don’t know how this is actually building a new planet This is really bizzare *grunt* Ooh! wha..? I don’t understand I don’t get what’s happening I- I have no idea what’s going on and I don’t know why and I’m scared That’s good? AYYYY! God, that takes so long! It’s stressful! Why does it do that? Is there anything left? Is there any… Oh no- OHHHH That’s the end of it Okay, so I was j- I was shit talking it a bit there, but this is one of those games that’s intentionally meant to be frustrating It reminds me of Amputee more than it reminds me of Surgeon Simulator it reminds me of amputee which was the first game after Surgeon Simulator to come out that kind of like, copied that format uh, If any of you, ANY of you, remember me playing Amputee, that’s what this one kind of reminds me of and it’s super weird that it does but it really really does. Like it really, honestly, truly, does. It’s super weird BUT Not bad I like it It’s uh, it’s meant to be weird It’s meant to be a little difficult There is potential here I mean, this kinda thing hasn’t, like, it’s not TOTALLY original but It is something… interesting So, I like it It was pretty good I like it I liked it I like it *sigh* Alright, so this game um… I don’t… …know but with a name like Shark Simulator, you can not… avoid it. I don’t know how the game goes I don’t know how the game mechanic is I don’t know if there’s a story and I don’t care. i don’t care when you get something like shark simulator that just pops into your lap, you play it. you don’t ask questions, you just play it So this is Spilltender.
You’re a bartender. And you need to give… Uh… Your patrons some drinks. Simple as that? Ok. Alright. U-dah… Uh-duh. Uh-duh-duh. Aw. Duh-duh.
[General Mark sounds inbound] Hu-duh. Oh no… Oh- this isn’t a c- Haoh. Hoah de da- Hoah. How does that work?! I’m “Hoah De D’oh”ing it as hard as it can Hoah De Doh. Oh… I gotta get it into the light… Ok. No! Why is it over there? Wuh- De- No! I’m not trying to PUT it over there I’m trying to spank the monkey trying to wheel it up so I can wang doodle it! Ok… Thank you? I guess? *mumbling* Alright, whatever, you stupid jackasses… What? That was right in your palm. You tellin’ me you don’t wan- there you go. Ok. I mean I’ve got these stupid beers that’re sitting off over here. That made it. Ok- Ugh Goddammit that wasn’t meant for- Goddamn peanut! “Last Call”? Hu-de-duh! Hu-de-dah The deadliest “Hu-de”- Uh oh. Shit. Goddammit… Hu-duh-buh-dah! Hu-buh-de- Oh goddamn the peanuts! Alright well that sucked… But I think I did ok. Beers served 9 Accuracy 41% Fastest serve 1 second Beers wasted $18 I made no money… Enter initials? mmmmmFUK OK, so FUK had $10 So this is all the game is? O… I see… wait that guy was thirsty but now his… His light’s gone! This doesn’t make… I am flingdoodling it as… How do I?… Oh my GAWD The controls… I… The shards of glass? Really? the shards of glass are the ones that… Oh boy… it’s like this game was meant to be controlled by a fingey… And i dont have the fingey ment for… OK… You know what I guess no one’s getting beer now… I was doing better when I didn’t know how to play… I mean I STILL don’t know how to play but… HUDEDUUUH HUDe… Hope you didn’t want peanuts. How am I supposed to even get them to you if you don’t… You better drink that… Look… HuDeDuhDe Drink into your HuDe GOBE SHOVE IT… Ok there you go. HUBEDUUH – There you go buddy Okay now I’m getting the hang of it. Shit! HUBEDUUB! Can I get a bullet time or something like that? Beer time? Is it beer time? Is it beer time yet babba? Bbba is it beer time? Well shit, I did worse than I did last time. How the frick did I do worse than I did last time??! You’re fired?? Well fuck! Alright. Goddamn you making me look bad. If it goes right to their hand, they drink it. Okay. Well I can’t get you down there, there’s peanuts in the way. I’m just- That’s for you later, this is for you later. *chuckle* If you know what I mean 😉 I mean not- NOOOOOOOOOOOoOoOooooo That’s gonna make it. Yeah? Grab it! With your- okay, okay HUBEDUUH! Here’s another one. Okay, so I just can’t be stupid about it. Like most things in life it would work if I just wasn’t incredibly stupid about it. Huh, no that’s peanuts. Well, that guys getting loaded up with beers something about him just makes me think alcoholic so I just kept shoving beers down his gob as hard as I could. No get it- It was right there- you have a beer. Okay you had a beer but now you don’t have a beer and now you do have a beer and now you have a beer Beer for you beer for you, double beer down there That technically went on you so it was yours so you pay money for that. Alright fine. Well I did better than before, but I don’t know if I feel good about it. Ass. So ASS FU- So ASS FUK. There.. Yeah Habadaba Habadaba shut the hell up habada? Hubu You have a deeper voice than you had before, I’m assuming the beer did something to that effect. Habada Also can I talk the nightmares that are these characters? Like the absolute- Ohhhh no. Aww come on why you’re breaking? Why you’re breaking? Is it too hard? Okay, you know, I can’t help you if you’re not actually gonna help me pick up the goddamn beer. Hubudu.. You got it buddy. I’m here for you. I live to serve you jackasses. Habada habadeboo. No! Why did that trip!? Its the goddam peanuts. Its a-oh. You mean if I don’t shove glass into the black gapping holes of your eyes. Okay so “ASS FUK ME” is the leaderboard as it stands right now. Why did you kick the peanuts? Please nooooo, peanut. Get it! Grab it! GRAB IT! GRAB IT! GRAB IT! Firmly grab it- Oh you fuck. [Putting on a deeper slower voice] One buff please. [Still putting on the voice] Give me one habada for my dahaba. [Normal voice] I think-I think my trick is I don’t need to let go. I’m letting go of the mouse-[gasp] I know how to play this game now. Okay that made no since. You did not even have a beer. Where did that come from, buddy? So I don’t need to let go, but at the same time everything horrible anyway, that I’m fired. You goddam sock puppet nightmares. Ahbada, get that. Oh come on. Oh come on! You intercepted that, you cockass! Habada in-Oh fuck. Hob-Why is tilting? Don’t tilt! You’re gonna get one-Why is it tilting? I It doesn’t fast if-uh. Ohhhhhh FUUUUUUC- Where is that going? Someone just knocked that into the sky and I don’t appreciate it. Habada for you, and habada for you, and Haba-Okay. Alright, were going to go “COK ASS COK FUK ME” Alright cool. Haba. Wha-You had a light, you had a-no ohhh. Oh no-OHH NO Pleas-Oh god, I’m gonna give you-You have a beer! You had a beer! This goddam broken game! This broken GAme. I got it, I got it. It’s not broken, this game is great. This game is well made, great, well done. In your hand, habada-Shit! Hhhaaaaabomp. Yes. Okay, I am in it to win it now. Little, good old righty-it’s in-it’s literally in your hand. Its-that was-ookay. It’s okay-NO! The interception! Okay. Haba, habibo-Oh shit. Awww, I was doing so good. Ohhh, I don’t know where this is going to be. Ohhh-I ju-uhhh. Brrr-uh uh “POO” “ASS COK FUK POO ME” [Laughs] Aww shit. Okay, here we go. Into your hand. This-it’s just a lie! You’re a lier! Okay maybe-maybe it’s not a lier. Okay, it just needs care-Why, why, WHY, WHY WOULD YOU GO THAT WAY! WHY WOULD YOU GO INTO THE ABYSS! WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT! Don’t do that! Heee-nooooo. Nooooo! Ahhhhh-Fine you know what, I did not want to serve you. No! Why! Why did that careen off into the abyss? This game is bullshit. Well that-that careened off into the abyss, but for obvious reasons. Hubada-GODDAM YOU! Don’t you-nuh uh-Just pick it-it’s right there! Pick it up! NO! WHAT THE HELL What the goddam, cocking, hell! OHHH FUCK! “PLS” “PLS ASS COK FUK POO ME” Why, you have an invisible wall in front of you! Why, you have an invisible wall in front of you! It does not make any since! It makes no since! Ahh shitty dicks. Okay, we got-This is going to be the one. Look how good I am. Look at how good I am! WHY! You had your chanc-Put it in your gob! Look down. You’re all looking at me, look at the beers coming right at you! Hot and heavy. Ahh shit. Too hot, too heavy. Its like that movie, too fast and too…heavy Too fast, too fuck. To fucks please. Please give me a fuck, that I have to give. Please ass cock fuck me. NOOOOOO! Just give him the beer. Just give him the goddam-UHHHH! Just take it, it’s right in front of your fucking head! You still that beer from that guy. That was not your beer and you did not pay for that. Alright, ummm, “WAP” “WAP PLS ASS COK FUK POO ME” I’m going to do one more try, cause I am a glutton for punishment. You have an invisible wall in front of you, why? Makes no since. WHY! Yeah, oh my god, I am so good Nooooo, okay, thats broken. Aba, how about it, buddy. How about no, fuck ass. How about…what the hell? NOOOOOOOO! THAT WAS GONNA BE-FUUCK! Oh, I hate this goddam game. Oh, fuck me. Fuck me! Please ass cock fuck me! Okay? Alright, you know what you, greedy bastards. Oka-You did not even want one. You want one and now you don’t have one. Alright. [Sigh] Uhhh, kek, “EEK”, “EEK” a mouse, “EKK” Um, “WAP PLS ASS EEK COK FUK POO ME” Okay, this is really spelling a story out. Okay, that did not make any since. Perfect. Okay, not perfect, but-ohhhhhh. Ohhh-ohhhhh-It’s all gone wrong. Beer for me, how about one for me. One for me, beer for me. I get beer, you don’t get beer. I get beer not for you. You don’t get that beer, you don’t get that beer, you don’t get that beer! Not you, not you, me! Me, all me. Last call for me! I need beer. I can’t drink beer. I’m drinking beer. None for you, all for me. All-oppsie poopsie. Oppsie poopsie, oppsie poopsie. Nobody gets beer, nobody get beer, nobody get beer. How about that? How about that, nobody get beer! How about nobody get beer? Huh, huh, huh! How about nobody get beer! Okay, “WAP PLS ASS EKK COK FUK POO ME” got it. Okay, anyway, I am out of here. So anyway, that was five weird games. Thank you everybody, so much for watching. I hope you enjoyed that. If you got any other odd-ball games, that you want me to play, put them in the description. No, you can’t put them in the description. Put them int the comments, down bellow, cause it’s sometimes hard to find, uh, the truly weird games. The truly meme games. If you got literally anything you want me to play, thats short and sweet and can’t be beat write it down in the comments. If you want to play anything that you saw here you can find it down in the description that you can’t write in. So, thank you everybody for watching, and as always, I will see you in the next video. Buh-bye [Outro Music] [Outro Music]